Tuesday, May 13, 2014

A pilgrimage into the heart of conflict

"From the earliest days of recorded history, conflict has been an integral part of human life. Although conflict and crisis are painful, they are visible and vital signs of the perpetual work of the church and society. Viewed in this light, they become sources of growth and gifts to be pressed into service.

The trouble with Jesus was—and is—that he stands in the midst of conflict, and allows the conflict actually to live in him even though it tears him apart, in order that new life might be born. The trouble with Jesus was—and is—that he invites us to follow where he has led." - Sam Portaro, Conflict and a Christian Life.

I used to fear conflict. It still makes me uneasy sometimes. Gradually, I'm learning to embrace it. I'm learning (and Sam's excellent book was an important prompt for me) that conflict is the prerequisite for creativity. That embracing conflict for its creative potential is how we unlock the treasures of the diversity of God's creation. That following Jesus on the way of the cross leads directly into conflict ... and thank God!

I'm also learning that it is hard work, this standing with Jesus in the midst of conflict. But it is work as a church given the mission of reconciliation that we cannot escape if we wish to be faithful.

On Monday morning, I will get on a plane and go to what could be argued is the epicenter of intractable conflict on planet Earth -- Jerusalem. The very words I use to describe my destination to people -- Israel/Palestine -- show that there is not even agreement on what this land is.

I am going as a pilgrim with a group of pilgrims -- with my goal not to change things there but to be changed myself. We will not just be visiting the holy sites of the geography (though there will be some of that) but the holy sites of people's lives and stories.  I am going with a group of Episcopal priests and bishops to learn about the many conflicts of that region. To listen deeply to voices of those who have given their lives to the various factions, and to some who are giving their lives to trying to bring creative harmony out of these conflicts.

The group I am traveling with is called Christians for Fair Witness on the Middle East, and it is led by a Roman Catholic nun, Sister Ruth Lautt, O.P, Esq., and their mission is to take denominational groups to Israel/Palestine to listen deeply to many different voices and to get a sense of the complexity of the conflict but also the potential gifts reconciliation has to offer. It is a remarkable group and an honor to go, particularly because it is invitation only and they cover basically all expenses - and also because my fellow pilgrims are extraordinary people. All they ask in return is that we give 10 days, open ears, mind and heart.

My hope in going is that through learning about the seemingly intractable conflicts in this region and also the faithful attempts at creative reconciliation, I will glean some wisdom that will be transferable to the conflicts we have in our own St. Louis region ... and to our role as a Cathedral to be a force for reconciliation. I imagine that, as true listening often does, I will come back in many ways more perplexed than when I left. But I am also hopeful that in this journey wisdom will emerge that can inform our conversations in the months and years ahead.

My intention is to try to bring you along on this journey through short bits of writing on a regular basis on this blog. I say that is my intention because I also know that I do not know what I will find when I get there, and though it is my intent, that might go the way of other best-laid plans.

I also imagine that much of what I hear, see and learn I will not want to react to immediately, but will commit to prayer and reflection. It's part of why I am taking an extra two days on the end of the journey to stay in residence at St. George's College and -- other than a trip to see the eye hospital that the Order of St. John supports -- spend that time in prayer, thought, walking the city's streets and sitting in its holy spaces.

I am deeply grateful to all those who make this journey possible. To Robin, who always bears an extra burden when I travel, and to Schroedter and Hayden, who bear a burden as well. To Amy Cortright, our wonderful vicar, and the rest of the staff of the Cathedral, whose excellence at all they do make it easy for me (not so much for them, perhaps) to leave without anxiety. To our wardens and Chapter who will exercise wonderful leadership in my absence.

Please keep me in your prayers and know that every step of this journey I will be traveling with you on my heart as well.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

it will change your life and upset you...and inspire you and leave you drawn deeper into the heart of God...safe travels!